Saturday, September 24, 2005
had a lecture on sex slave trade in s'pore and the neighbouring countries, particularly west kalimantan, batam island, indonesia...and child sex tourism....and exploitation and abuse in general...like that of migrant workers, mostly maids (some with false documents)...even forced transnational marriage in which domestic violence may be present...or the trafficking of babies after they force the girls to give birth...we did a discussion in which different groups explored the perspectives of the agents, the 'mommies' and the patrons..though no one did the perspectives on the victims, the family members of the victims and the local authorities...which i think was kind of a pity...
anyway i was in the 'mommies' team and we came up with certain interesting stuff...like how these mommies could have been sex-slaves once (and the guest lecturer did confirm that most of them were prostitutes once)...so the intriguing question was how then could they have continued to support this business when they themselves know the pain and suffering of the victims??!!! perhaps they wanted to spread the suffering and pain so that they were not the only victims? they want others to go through what they have experienced...as a sort of revenge? it's their turn to make others suffer? for some of them do abuse the girls under their control...so some kind of transference?? perhaps they couldn't get themselves out of the quagmire of prostitution since they are already in so deep so instead of wallowing in self-pity, they might as well make some good...whatever good they can squeeze out of their miserable life...by rising up the ranks...an acceptance of fate and destiny...a versatility of human beings, esp of women to adapt to circumstances...an adjustment to life as they find it...OR it was the only trade, skill or even the kind of life they know and are familiar with so why change to something that will hold insecurity? becoz remember they have been poor so why give up a life which they have at least some control over for one that would be unpredictable and hard? or the trade is already established, even if they don't buy the girls, others would ..so why miss out the opportunity? the girls are good long-term investments and they might think they r doing the gals a favour too for they could have fallen into the hands of a more cruel 'mommy'...some ppl of coz think that the 'mommies' may be good underneath..that they believed the agents would give part of the money they had paid for the gals to the girls' families...BUT living in such a society and perhaps even having experienced that kind of life before, would they be so naive??!! it's very doubtful...at least to me...or they maybe just doing their jobs too, being under the control of gangs who operate the brothels...
the interesting thing is how these 'mommies' got the bucks to buy their 1st girl prostitute for the girls dun usually come cheap..alomst 1000 rupees and above...so if they were prostitutes once, under a 'mommy' who controlled their money and had lotsa debts to cover, where in the hell do they get the money to pay the agents?...since a 'mommy' probably won't be so stupid as to let a girl 'finish' paying off her debts for that would mean that she would lose a good earning machine and had to pay for a brand new one to start all over again...
the agents...do they feel guilty/remorseful knowing that the girls whom they have told were supposed to be working in honest, decent jobs like selling vegetables ended up being maids who got abused or forced into prostitution?..OR do they treat these girls as mere commodities...to be traded for profit and money?? ...again the mentality that if I don't do it, i'll lose out because everyone's doing it....they may feel sorry bout what happened to the girls but that's life...some have it good...some just dun have the luck...the girls have made a choice when they decided to venture out of the village to work..and they can't blame anyone but themselves or their fate...they can't stop too because it's their livelihood and they have to feed their own families... BUT i was wondering...aren't they afraid that this will hurt their reputation and hence their network and their business? for once the girls they have found jobs for meet with mishap and the word gets back to the villages, people would recognise him as a rogue and no one would trust them anymore in that village...would it be a loss? especially if the word spreads to other villages for villages are not isolated what with friends and acquaintances and relatives....perhaps the village headmen and traditional figures manage to hush it all up...perhaps the girls are so driven to desperation that they think that every opportunity is a hope and of course everyone of us harbour the thought that whatever misfortune that befall on others may not happen to us...
the patrons...the cheap thrill...looking for companionship...a need to assert their manliness and these submissive girls make it easier...prostitutes are professionals and the sex would be better...prof asked one of them if he would use a condom? and the guy replied yes if the girl wants him to..BUT i was thinking "reallY?" ...i mean isn't having sex without a condom supposed to be better??? so why would he agree to it? ..."is he afraid of getting STDs?" another guy said tt the experience is worth the risk...another thing i was wondering...old s'porean men in their 60s or 70s frequent such places...and it was kinda disgusting thinking of them trying to get it up...esp if the prostitutes were still under 18, literally a child by UN definitions....i mean ...it's almost like having sex with your granddaughter???!!! this was another pt brought out by the guest lecturer who said that we often alienate ourselves fr the people we exploit...for eg the agents and 'mommies' dun think in terms of "what if my own daughters or sisters become forced into prostitution too?" would we still be as calm & distanced? we often separate ourselves into "us" and "them" so much so that we forget that we are actually one and the same...we are all brothers living on the same planet, belonging to the same species...
someone pointed out that the agents and the 'mommies' are cold and dehumanised...they treat the girls as commodities, as animals...not human beings...perhaps it's true...BUT think of it this way....here we are sitting comfortably in an air-conditioned lecture theatre, with money aplenty in our wallets and food in our stomach and we are sitting high up on a pedestal criticising people who are struggling out there trying to make ends meet in a shitty life ...what right do we have to criticise when we ourselves have never worried about our basic necessities before? they may be cold and stuff BUT remember they are themselves trying to make a living...when one is desperate and hungry and poor...sometimes a person can't afford to have too much passion or feelings or compassion or conscience if he was to survive...nobility and charity only comes when people are rich and have plenty to spare...no matter how much we wish ourselves to be "good samaritans", it's still a "each man for himself" world out there...face it, man is selfish... it's a survival instinct...we look out always for ourselves first...immediate family members second...you may think you don't...BUT u r...subconsciously...there is no such thing as a "selfless" person...that's just a term we invent to boost our own egos..and to set an ideal standard...it's too idealised and utopian...
just like what the guest lecturer and some of the rest said about "personal responsibility"...the agents, the patrons and even the 'mommies' should not shirk their responsibilities...they are perpetuating the problem...they should all stand up against it and stop what they are doing if they feel guilty...i keep hearing this term mentioned again and again in relation to every single thing...we should be responsible individuals...stand up for freedom...stand up against war...petition against sex slave trade...blah blahz ...if we ourselves don't start taking action, no one ever will....and nothing would be changed...this may be true...BUT again...we are merely moralising...trying to act noble and charitable and moral...we duno their situation...can't even begin to understand them..because most of us have always grown up in the protection of our family..most of us have never suffered poverty and desperation...so who are we to judge them? if they have a choice would the 'mommies' choose to be who they are? perhaps some of them would because however we hope that men are good at heart, there will always be some who succumb to the such a lucrative business...for one of the seven deadly sins is greed...money will always be the root of certain evils...
'personal responsibility' should have been something so internalised that we should not have to be educated about it...YET here we are being reminded time and again....it's sad...it shows how deeply tainted and corrupted we are...BUt then again...when one is at the abyss of desperation and death from hunger, how many of us would still act moral? if we are all put into their situation, would we be able to prevent ourselves from getting entangled in this web? who knows? seriously, i myself dun have that much confidence over my 'integrity'...
one thing the guest lecturer raised bout how we may say that these people there are sick...but it's also the society and the system that's sick...it's sick how these people can give so much justifications for the depraving acts that they have done...it's sick how the local authorities can ignore these problems and allow it to fester and even grow...it's sick how relationships between humans have been reduced to mere transactions..perhaps BUT dun u think it's too presumptous? too pessimistic? we use "sick" to label any aberrations or deviations in our society so much so that we have forgotten something important...what standard are we measurng them against? our societal yardstick? BUT they are living in a different country, with different conditions and problems from us...they are in a different culture and society...so does this mean that we are morally better than them? are we? seriously, i think ALL of us are sick to a certain extent...we too self-justify...why? because we want to protect our egos...we are afraid to admit our mistakes...it's a face-saving device...it's a fear of seeing our true depraved self...their sickness is merely manifested in a more controversial issue, prostitution...are they the only ones who exploit people? NO!!! exploitation takes place everywhere at every moment...is done by and experienced by everyone...people exploit relationships...they pull strings to get what they want...to climb up the corporate ladder...they use networks...to look for jobs...it's even taught in career seminars...even something so noble as charity can be seen as a form of exploitation...ppl use charity as a means to put themselves in the limelight..charity organisations exploit sympathy and empathy....we don't realise it because we are so used to it...it's embedded in our culture and mindset....it's acceptable...it's the norm...
perhaps we should do some self-evaluation before we make conclusions about people as "sick" or "cold"? are we ourselves so "warm" and "generous" and "caring"? by criticising others, aren't we imposing our own will and morals on others?....we set the morals and societal standards? us, human beings...are we infallible?
dun get it wrong...i'm not saying that forced prostitution and child-sex tourism is pardonable or even correct...i'm just thinking about how easy it is for us to judge others as if we ourselves are morally upright and above them...when we duno nothing....we just get so used to throwing labels such as "cold", "dehumanised" and "sick" around that we dun see the other side of the coin...and ignore the circumstances and even the feelings of others....
how to solve such problems? again people blame the local auhorities...it's quite sad how the government and institutions get blamed first for every single societal problem...dun forget what are institutions made up of? PEOPLE....people like you or me...they are not infallible...they can become corrupted too...they can make mistakes too...it's sad how small mistakes made by public figures are unpardonable when normal people like us make the same mistakes as if they are part and parcel of our life..and we dun get so much as condemned as being expected to make such mistakes....unlike s'pore which is small and compact and easy to govern...other countries are not....there are provinces and towns and villages...the proliferation of government laws are not as entrenched as the grassroot organisations here....it may seem admirable how well our government is controlled....BUT they have it easy, at least in the geographical sense...i shall not make the mistake of denying the fact that we may have to deal with problems which other countries dun haf to...such as how our small size make us all the more vulnerable to attacks from other countries and the importance of maintaining friendly relations with every single bloody country...
perhaps a need to break the poverty circle..even tho it is inevitable that sex trade will always exist in every society...since it is impossible to eliminate the ecnomic imbalance...there will always be rich and poor people...communism just doesn't work...however...i feel a reduction in poverty will at least curb the flourishing of such trade...education may help...though these people are so poor that to raise awareness may not stop them from trusting these agents...
so yupz...another mind-boggling lecture...tho how is this topic related to psychopathology - a sickness of the mind? perhaps the part where the people, the system and the society is sick? perhaps...BUT then we are all psychopathic...at the extreme end of the continuum...confused...
seriously...i felt the whole lecture to be some propaganda instead of some intellectual stuff...though sometimes...everything is a kinda propaganda to me...lol
BUT then again....i'm moralising here too...who am i to criticise? in actual fact...i'm a hypocrite...somone with double standards...
Blogado por moi às 1:18 AM ||
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